May 1, 2011

Going to the Chapel...

I... am a two time loser.  I was married the first time when I was 19.  And no, I wasn't pregnant.  I was just very very dumb.

My first husband was cute.  I mean -- REALLY cute.  Like, the lady who waited on us while we were trying on our wedding rings hit on him cute.  And when you're 19 and the really really cute guy asks you to marry him, you do it.

Yeah -- I was never the brightest bulb in the lighting department.

Actually, my first husband was in the military and, in case you didn't know it, the military doesn't pay very well.  At all.  We'd been dating for about 18 months and we knew if we got married, his Basic Allowance for Quarters (BAQ) would go up significantly.  So -- we tied the knot.

First clue that this probably wasn't the best idea was the fact that we had to pawn our TV in order to afford the marriage license.  But, we were married and we gave it our best shot.  For about a year.  And then, splitsville.

Although my first marriage ended for a lot of reasons, I harbor no ill will towards my ex.  In fact, it took us over 7 years to finally get divorced and in that time, we got back together and broke up a bunch more times.  But, eventually, we did divorce. 

Starter marriage -- FAIL.

In between marriage #1 and marriage #2 I was engaged. Several times. To several different men.  Well -- they kept asking and the rings kept getting prettier so I kept saying "Yes!"  Not. Brightest.  Bulb. 

Actually, I dated one guy for almost 3 years and my parents loved him.  LOVED him.  Especially my dad.  And even though I knew he wasn't the guy for me -- I felt like if I didn't marry him, I was going to let my parents down.  And since I'd already done that in an epic way with marriage #1, I didn't want to do it again.  But, eventually, I knew I just couldn't marry the guy and I called things off.

My other ex-fiancé asked me to marry him the week his father died.  On Father's Day.  The guy was already having a pretty craptastic week so it seemed like saying no right then would be cruel.  So I didn't.  But eventually, just a few months down the road, we realized we were a big mistake and broke things off.  Whew.

And then I met ex-husband #2.  And on paper, ex-husband #2 seemed pretty terrific.  He wrote me poetry.  He bought me flowers. And diamond earrings. He took me to Jamaica for vacation.  He seemed nice, and normal and like a good catch.  So, we got married, had two kids, and kept a pretty good face on things for quite a few years.  But, we weren't really happy together and (as written about previously) we got the Big D

So now I'm a two time loser.  Yay me.  I swore I was never EVER dating again.  

And then I started dating Peter.  So much for swearing.  Peter's track record really isn't any better than mine.  So, when we started dating, we agreed we were NEVER getting married. Like... EVER.

I don't have any true desire to be a three-time loser.  Not that I think I will be -- it took me 25 years of kissing a whole lot of frogs before I finally found my prince.  And, despite the myriad of challenges and obstacles our relationship presents, we're very happy with each other.  My kids love him, my parents love him.  Shoot -- even my ex-husband likes him.

The problem -- Peter is a marrying man.  He's old fashioned to the core and if he's in love -- he's getting married.  And, as of right now, he's in love with me.  So, about 4 months after we started dating, he asked me to marry him.  And, of course, I said yes.

Well, the ring was pretty
The Happy Couple

1 comment:

  1. To borrow a phrase from the retail giant, Nike, and hopefully without any copyright infringement charges...."JUST DO IT!!" You two are great together and it's Pete, for God's sake! You know he would give you the moon if he could, and I don't see him turning into a raving idiot anytime soon!! Plus, the after-party will be epic! :)